What are the interesting psychological knowledge?

2020-12-28 | KnowYourself Original |

How was everyone doing in the last week of 2020?

Yue Xiaotu recently reviewed the papers she had read this year, and found that several studies were particularly interesting and worth sharing with KY fans again. Let’s review the past and learn new things with Yue Xiaotu~

Those who succeeded in digging walls,

Will you be happy?

Mate poaching Mate poaching means that when a person knows that the other person has a partner, the person still chooses to pursue the other person. Many people who choose to dig the other person’s wall will think that “it’s my ability to dig the wall” and “canBeing dug by me shows that we are true love".

However, a study published in "The Journal of Sex Research" pointed out: The more people who have experienced digging relationships, the lower the quality of intimacy, and the higher their chances of cheating in existing relationships.

In this study, 653 American adults in close relationships submitted valid questionnaires online. Among them, 88 subjects honestly confessed that they were actively digging walls, and 116 subjects reported that they were being digged.Of the people, 60 subjects said they would dig each other with each other; the rest of the subjects were "honest people" in the relationship and had not experienced digging.

Researchers also asked the subjects about their current relationship status, whether they had been infidelity in the current relationship, their views on sexual behavior outside the relationship, and their satisfaction, trust, and jealousy in the current relationship.

The results show that those who have experienced digging relationships twice or more have the highest degree of jealousy in the relationship. And the more digging or being digged in the past relationship, the more satisfaction in the current relationship.Low. Researchers explained that the reason why the quality of intimate relationships is not high is partly because they have a stronger tendency and more open attitude towards sex without commitment.

The relationship between physical derailment and mental derailment with gender, relationship duration, education level, and history of digging walls. The screenshot is from Belu, CF, & O'Sullivan, LF 2020. Once a poacher always a poacher? Mate poaching history andits association with relationship quality. The Journal of Sex Research, 574, 508-521.

Interestingly, the researchers also found that: Compared with people who have not had a digging experience, those who have had a digging relationship will have about 3.5 times the probability of sexual infidelity in the current relationship, and mental infidelity The probability of romantic infidelity will increase by about 4.5 times; and the probability of derailment will continue to double for those who have digging walls twice or more.

So, don’t be naive to think that digging the foot of the wall will bring real happiness. After all, you may have dug him today, and he will be dug away by others tomorrow; if he digs you today, he can dig again tomorrow.other people……

Looking hard to follow will make you more attractive?

Yes to a certain extent, but it’s hard to say for a long time

Before the relationship starts, how can I attract the people I like more? Some people may think that play hard to get is unnecessary; but some people think that when choosing a mate, "pick" will better show their own value and charm. Which statement is more scientific?

The latest research published in the "Journal of Social and Personal Relations" shows that when a person looks difficult to follow, the suitor will give him a higher courtship value, and thus produce stronger sexuality.Desire; in order to see this difficult person again, the other party is willing to work harder.

The researchers conducted a total of three sets of experiments. In the experiment, the researchers told the subjects that he would start a chat with another subject. But in fact, the chat partners are all pre-arranged "actors"-halfOf the subjects will be arranged to interact with a person who is more picky during the courtship process "difficult to chase" setting; while the other half of the subjects will be arranged to interact with a relatively non-critical person "good chase" settingChat. After that, the researcher asked the subjects to assess the other's difficulty, courtship value, and sexual attractiveness.

Whether it is in the context of online interaction Experiment 1 or face-to-face communication Experiment 2, the results show that the higher the participants’ perception of the difficulty of chasing, the higher the evaluation of the courtship value of the other party, andHave more sexual desires towards each other.

In the first set of online chat experiments, the relevant data obtained from the two files that are difficult to follow and those that are easy to follow. The screenshots are from Birnbaum, GE, Zholtack, K., & Reis, HT 2020. No pain, no gain: Perceived partner mate value mediates the desire-inducing effect of being hard to get during online and face-to-face encounters.Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 378-9, 2510-2528.

In the third set of experiments, the researchers adopted a more natural online chat situation and additionally tested whether the subjects tried hard to have the next interaction with the other party at the end of the conversation. The results were similar to the first two experiments.Consistency: The harder to chase, the more attractive to the suitor, the more willing the suitor to pursue it.

Admittedly, this conclusion seems a bit politically incorrect, but it may be good news for people who are always accused of "You are too picky to be single". After all, the research has said it, and it seems very "You are actually very charming!

However, we also want to remind everyone that in the long run, the quality of the development of an intimate relationship still depends on the true selves of the partners and their sincere interest in each other. We do not encourage everyone to pursue strategy blindly~

Want faster and better after a fight?

You need to use this posture

When arguing with your partner, are you still arguing with him with your hands on your hips, big eyes and small eyes? Recently, a study published in "Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy" found that if you want to be fasterReconcile, you can try to hold hands with your partner during a fight!

The research team led by HJ Conradi and others invited 47 heterosexual couples who have been in love for more than one year as subjects, and divided them into a "no-hand quarrel" group and a "hand-in-hand quarrel" group. In the experiment, The subject couples will have multiple rounds of discussions on topics with huge differences in opinions between the two sides. In the discussion, the research team will monitor their heartbeats in real time, and will also observe the number of effective and ineffective communications during a fight.

The results show that when couples quarrel, the heart rate of both men and women in the holding group will decrease, the proportion of effective communication will increase, and the positive emotion will increase.

The picture above shows the heart rate comparison of couples arguing with and without holding hands; the following two pictures show the comparison of effective and ineffective communication between men and women holding hands and arguing without holding hands. Screenshot from Conradi, HJ, Noordhof, A., & Arntz, A. 2020. Improvement of conflict handling: Hand-holding during and after conflict discussions affects heart rate, mood, and observed communication behavior in romantic partners.Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 465, 419-434.

Why is this?

The scholars explain that physical contact will promote the body to secrete more Oxytocin, and will also inhibit the sharp rise of Cortisol in stressful situations. These hormonal changes will relieve our quarrels on the one handThe various physiological reactions of time, including lowering blood pressure and slowing down heart rate, will also make us feel more positive emotions.

Secondly, past studies have pointed out that when the level of oxytocin rises, people will be more able to establish effective communication and their trust in each other will also increase. With trust, couples are more likely to establish a cooperative relationship in communication, Rather than an antagonistic relationship, making it easier to reconcile after a fight.

Then, what if you are embarrassed to hold hands during a fight? Holding hands after the fight is also very effective!

This study also found that after a couple holds hands after a fight, the heart rate of both parties will also decrease, allowing the body to gradually calm down; positive emotions will also be effectively improved.

Heart rate comparison between couples holding hands and not holding hands after a fight. Screenshots from Conradi, HJ, Noordhof, A., & Arntz, A. 2020. Improvement of conflict handling: Hand-holding during and after conflict discussions affects heart rate, mood, and observed communication behavior in romantic partners.Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 465, 419-434.

In short, there are many benefits to arguing with your little hand. Next time you are so angry that you want to "get eight pieces" of Ta, maybe you will lose your breath by pulling your little hand~ヽ○??乂*??`*乂?`●

Research findings:

The "female host" may make the marriage even more unhappy

After a couple starts to live together or get married, one of the biggest problems encountered may be the distribution of housework: if you do more housework, you will worry that the other person will become lazier; if you do less, they may nothappy.

This year, a paper published in the journal "Socius: Sociological Research for a Dynamic World" explored the relationship between relationship satisfaction and housework assignments. The researchers collected data from the Marital and Relationship Survey in 2006.The information of 487 groups of heterosexual couples who have cohabited in the United States was collected, and the self-reports of both men and women in the following areas were sorted out using the scale: satisfaction with the marriage relationship, daily housework distribution, sense of fairness in housework distribution, and the relationship between partnersCommunication quality. The variables controlled by the researcher include the age of the respondent, education level, religious belief, length of paid work, self-assessed health status, and gender equality.

Screenshot from Carlson, DL, Miller, AJ, & Rudd, S. 2020. Division of housework, communication, and couples' relationship satisfaction. Socius: Sociological Research for a Dynamic World, 6, 1-17.

Analysis results show that the way women communicate determines how the two parties allocate housework. When women communicate negatively, men will do more, but they will be less satisfied with the relationship.

However, the way men communicate does not affect how the two parties distribute housework, but will be affected by the result of housework distribution. When men take on housework equally, they can better communicate with their partners, and when women mainly take on houseworkAt that time, men’s communication was worse.

At the same time, for women, equal family division of labor is important to their relationship satisfaction; for men, relationship satisfaction depends on how the woman communicates with him, and has nothing to do with the housework.

That is to say, in the matter of housework assignment, the woman says it well, and the man takes the initiative to do it, and both parties are satisfied; the woman does a lot of housework, and the man not only does less, but also can’t learn to speak well...

Now you know how to distribute the housework~

"Salted fish makes people happy" has a scientific basis!

Are you still anxious while salting fish? A study published by the University of Zurich in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin found that timely enjoyment is the same as pursuing long-term goals and maintaining self-discipline.Can make people get long-term happiness.

In the study, Katharina Bernecker and others developed a questionnaire to measure the participants’ ability to enjoy instant enjoyment that is, the ability to focus on their current needs, invest in, and enjoy short-term pleasure. Through the questionnaire, the researcherI want to find out whether different people have differences in their ability to enjoy in time, and whether this ability is related to people's happiness level.

It turns out that when some people choose to have fun in time, they are also disturbed by long-term goals intrusive thoughts. For example, when lying on a sofa, they suddenly remember that they have not done any exercise today.Compared with those who can fully immerse themselves in the happiness of salted fish, they can get more happiness and suffer less from anxiety and depression.

So, the worst thing is not just playing and not working hard, but not having fun when playing...

Eating food is more responsible?

People who love yawning are more friendly?

These little habits can reveal your personality!

If you want to judge the personality of the other person from getting along, what would you pay attention to? Common ways of judging may be through social relationships, circle of friends, or chat content. However, one item was recently published in the European Journal of Personality European Journal of Personality.The research on found that many unexpected behaviors are actually related to our personality traits.

The study recruited 462 subjects and recorded their daily lives with portable recording devices for 2-6 days. After that, the researchers analyzed the subjects’ behavior and language habits through the collected recording information.

The study analyzed the correlation between the five personality traits and daily behavior and language. Screenshots from Tackman, AM, Baranski, EN, Danvers, AF, Sbarra, DA, Raison, CL, Moseley, SA,... Mehl, MR 2020. “Personality in Its Natural Habitat” revisited: A pooled, multi‐sample examination of the relationships between the big five personality traits and daily behavior and language use.European Journal of Personality.

The results show that people’s language habits are likely to reveal their personal character. For example, friendly people prefer not to use "I" but to use "we" as the subject; responsible people often have more pauses before speaking.Researchers believe that these associations may be because friendly people are more concerned about interpersonal relationships, while responsible people are more cautious before speaking.

However, there are some associations that I don’t understand at first glance. For example, extroverts are not easy to cough and sneeze, friendly people often yawn, and responsible people prefer to eat...

Although this study does not indicate any causal relationship between personality and specific behaviors, it also confirms from the side that the influence of personality on personality traits may be much broader than we know.

As a foodie, will you be praised if you show this research to your friends?

References:

Belu, CF, & O'Sullivan, LF 2020. Once a poacher always a poacher? Mate poaching history and its association with relationship quality. The Journal of Sex Research, 574, 508-521.

Bernecker, K., & Becker, D. 2020. Beyond self-control: Mechanisms of hedonic goal pursuit and its relevance for well-being.Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 014616722094199.

Birnbaum, GE, Zholtack, K., & Reis, HT 2020. No pain, no gain: Perceived partner mate value mediates the desire-inducing effect of being hard to get during online and face-to-face encounters.Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 378-9, 2510-2528.

Carlson, DL, Miller, AJ, & Rudd, S. 2020. Division of housework, communication, and couples' relationship satisfaction.Socius: Sociological Research for a Dynamic World, 6, 1-17.

Conradi, HJ, Noordhof, A., & Arntz, A. 2020. Improvement of conflict handling: Hand-holding during and after conflict discussions affects heart rate, mood, and observed communication behavior in romantic partners.Journal of Sex& Marital Therapy, 465, 419-434.

Tackman, AM, Baranski, EN, Danvers, AF, Sbarra, DA, Raison, CL, Moseley, SA,... Mehl, MR 2020. "Personality in Its Natural Habitat" revisited: A pooled, multi‐sample examination of the relationships between the big five personality traits and daily behavior and language use.European Journal of Personality.

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